Skin Fluke

I went to the opening of the Jeff Koons-curated “Skin Fruit” show at the New Museum the other night. When I got there, Jeff Koons was in the main lobby/atrium area, chatting with lots of people. Someone had given him some sort of prismatic picture-viewing object with two viewfinder eye holes. Koons looked into it and then looked back at the person and smiled and said “Wow!”

But really, the show was all about this guy, Dakis Joannou:

He’s the guy on the right. He is a really really rich industrialist and art collector. Big fan of Jeff Koons apparently. He also likes Maurizio Cattelan a lot, as evidenced by the sculptures on the left, and the epic Cattelan sculptures included in the show, one of which Roberta Smith rags on hard in her excellent excellent excellent review of the show. She is first of all such an amazingly clear writer, and second of all, she really makes an effort to understand and communicate the context, which is so essential for drawing meaning from contemporary art – both the meaning of the work itself, and the meaning of the way it is presented.

Tasty pull-quote:

Sure, “Skin Fruit” includes several outstanding artworks by significant talents, and there are a few genuine surprises. But whether the artists are 1980s stars like Mike Kelley and Cindy Sherman or relative newcomers like John Bock, Nathalie Djurberg and Dan Colen, nearly all are well-known quantities in New York, widely supported by other museums and high on many collectors’ must-have lists. Nearly all emanate from one stratum of the art world: the one where the money is. Is this the most effective way for the New Museum to use its time, space and energy? That’s the question of the art season.

For an interesting dose of context, note the yacht to the left, owned by Mr. Joannou, and custom-painted by Mr. Koons.

Overall the show was ridiculous. Jeff Koons jammed in as much big-big-big work as humanly possible into the not-huge New Museum galleries. There were some amazing pieces though. A Paweł Althamer sculpture actually had a real guy strapped to a real Roman-style cross, struggling and shaking and not enjoying himself at all. Sounds kinda stupid maybe, but is stunning in real life. And…damnit, this Koons piece to the right, “One Ball Total Equilibrium Tank,” is actually awesome. We’ve probably all seen it before one way or another, but it’s still kinda sick. Apparently, it’s salt water in the bottom half of the tank, fresh water floating on top, and the ball sits right in the middle of the two layers. I had never noticed this before, but the ball says “Dr. J.K.” Hardy harr!

Also, Tauba Auerbach’s painting was impressive as usual. It wasn’t this one (to the left), but a similar idea. Her website is cool, btw.

One last thought: “Skin Fruit” is really the title? Really, Jeff Koons? We made lots of skin flute jokes on hockey team road trips when I was 12. No one on the team had actually had consensual sexual relations yet at that point, but we all obsessively shared ridiculous metaphors and what-if sexual scenarios. But never did we come up with something so clever as “Skin Fruit.” What a crisscross. Thank you, Jeff Koons. Thank you.

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bk_mfa, March 6th 2010 | Posted in museums, painting, sculpture

On Jerry Saltz and dickishness

I participated in the BYOA art show last week at X Initiative (Former DIA) space in Chelsea. I contributed this painting:

A friend invited me to participate in the show, and to act in a videotaped performance piece there as well. It was fun to hang out with some friends, make some new ones, and get out of various time warps and black holes I’d been stuck in for a stretch there.

The BYOA show was a 24-hour show only, totally uncurated. It was just like, show up, hang your stuff, drink beers, and then take it all down the next day. Jerry Saltz, nymag art critic, was there. He wandered around, looking at stuff and opining.

Weird: Jerry Saltz was not alone. He was followed and surrounded (both, literally) by at least 20 onlookers at all times. The majority of these followers seemed to be Asian. Weird.

Actual scene: I’m hanging out with some friends, finishing a borrowed Bud tall boy, talking about my friend Mark’s penis sculpture which eventually got stolen later that night. So then, Mark alerts me that Jerry Saltz is dangerously close to my painting and may be talking about it. I then approach the group and literally muscle my way into the crowd. Jerry is just starting to talk about my painting. He goes, “Now this painting…whose is this? Is the artist here?”

I’m there, so I say, “Yes.”

Jerry looks at the painting for a second and says, “This one, it’s just, this is just very generic.” He looks back at me and continues, “Yeah, I’m sorry, it’s just generic. I’ve seen the space before, I’ve seen the marks before, there’s just nothing unique about it. It’s just…very generic.” He grimaces, half-smiling, and says, “Sorryeeeeeeee?”

I say, “No it’s fine, that’s ok. But that’s it? That’s your criticism? It’s just generic? That’s all you have to say about this?” (Note: I’m SURROUNDED by amateur Asian videographers throughout all this.)

He says, “Yes, I’m sorryeeeee?”

Then we talked a little more and addressed the fact that we were no longer facebook friends, and we should rectify this. We did a fist bump, and all was right with the world. And now we are indeed facebook friends again, Jerry and I.

So then, a few days later, I come across this article from artsjournal. Nutshellage: Jerry Saltz has been busily piling on unctuous praise for Jeff Koons lately, and another art critic named John Yau stepped in and wrote this other article going: Wait, why do we need a big critic to tell us that Jeff Koons is awesome again, isn’t that what douchey collectors do when they buy his stuff? Then Saltz writes on facebook, “How very dickish of John Yau.” And then (THEN! such drama!), Saltz posts this open letter on facebook, doing his best to keep it real, while inviting criticism of his own criticism.

Back in reality, Jerry Saltz is just some dude making a living, doing what he knows best, and selling books and magazines in the process. Now, tripping over oneself to love on Jeff Koons is idiotic, but then again, so’s my day job. In general, Jerry says, “I like this, I don’t like that, and here’s some sort of poetic rationalization.” And we’re like, “Yeah, I guess Jeff Koons is ok. Or, wait a minute…,” and then we flip to the movie review section and we’re like, “Hurt Locker!” and the whole Koons thing is gone like Tuesday’s turpentine.

So THEN (at last) Saltz’s wife, NY Times art critic Roberta Smith, writes a razor-sharp critique of NYC Museums, basically saying that gigantor assembly-line, uber-generic artists like Jeff Koons are not the artists to pay attention to. My favorite paragraph:

What’s missing is art that seems made by one person out of intense personal necessity, often by hand. A lot but not all of this kind of work is painting, which seems to be becoming the art medium that dare not speak its name where museums are concerned.

Ssssssssssnap!!! Sorryeeeeeee?

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bk_mfa, February 14th 2010 | Posted in art world, gossip, jon shehee, museums, painting, sculpture